It's Called Now. Don't miss it!
Ruthie’s date made me think about this.
You can say it in any one of a million ways:
— Normally we do not some much look at things as overlook them. (Zen Quote by Alan Watts)
You can say it in Latin:
— Carpe diem (seize the day)
You can say it simply with an expression we’ve heard a zillion times:
— Stop and smell the roses.
And E. Tolle wrote a whole book about it:
–The Power of Now.
You can know it, feel it, understand it and still not do it. I know because I am one of the world’s worst offenders.
I FORGET TO ENJOY THE MOMENT!!!!!!!
Got a lot of great excuses for it too. I have sooooo much to do. If I don’t take care of it who will? I wonder when the other shoe is going to drop? And will I be ready when it does? (this last one is a function of my unusually fearful nature).
I think men are a little better at the carpe diem thing. Partly, I think it’s because we women are often the detail mutli-tasking point person behind the day. That having been said, even when we are single we tend to worry about the ‘what if?’ and the tomorrow of things to the extent we can’t enjoy what’s happening at the moment. I think that is, in part, due to societal norms. I also think it has a lot to do with biology. Men have a more risk taking and competitive nature.
I know, I know!! – that’s a gross generalization – but men and women are different! We produce different chemicals in the same situation and I am not just talking testosterone and estrogen – – vasopressin oxytocin among others come into play in different ways when men and women are confronted with the same situation. Also different parts of our brain light up on occasion when we are confronting the same situation demonstrating that we use different skills to respond.
Sorry for the digression but years ago I read this great book called Sex on the Brain that talked about the biological differences between men and women that do not necessarily define us but produce strong tendencies towards certain behavior. It was so enlightening that I read others (I never trust one source) – and I became intrigued by the topic.
Okay, the bio lesson is over –
Back to the dating thing. When women talk about a new guy and a date we spend a lot of time thinking about ‘Is he the one?’ ‘How could this work?’ ‘Well I don’t like this but I like that. How can we get passed it?” With all that pressure we put on the date we forget to enjoy the evening.
He may or may not be a good fit. He may be good for a couple of dates. He may be just a one date and out. But let’s not miss the fun you can have on the one date. Even if it turns into nothing we still had THAT evening and THAT time to enjoy whatever you two did and meeting someone new.
So Ladies of the Crew whether you have a new man, the same man or no man at all. Whatever your status and whatever you’re into. Whatever your work day brings, whatever your children do – TAKE A MOMENT and ENJOY IT.
Stop and remember that your tummy is full (some people aren’t getting that today) or that you do have a friends and family (even if it’s virtual) and finds something to say ahhhhhhh about. Either the weather, a smile, a nice store clerk or you can seize the cliche and actually go out and smell a rose.
I intend to and I will report back. Here’s wishing you
Peace and a Moment of Joy.