This was on my mind ...

49/101/8/1

49 – My age
101 -The temperature at
8 pm -last night where I played tennis for
1 hour

There is a thin line between dedication and foolhardiness and I flirting with it.

Been getting a few interesting questions of late which I do plan to answer. Was going to do it this morning but I’m still suffering from the effects of last night. (what was I thinking?)

Maybe I should go back to bed.

HMMMMMM, Yes, I think that is exactly what I will do.

Maybe I’ll holler later.

Peace.

Cooler Heads

First, I want to say that the mall thing went as well as could be expected. I put them in the right department and then I went to look at purses. Little static when I got back. “I want this” “They don’t have that”

My response was soul calming. “Find it here or find it on line. Let’s eat.” It was, I must say, a quiet lunch but I felt fine. And to be fair 14 perked up a bit when I fed him. New lesson: Never talk a hungry adolescent anywhere.

They said thank you though at the end. So all is well.

09 Your crew is behind you. I don’t know your boss or how the conversation went. But yours is a problem a lot of people run into so I thought I’d give my ten cents worth:

1) never let your hurt feelings do your talking for you. Emotions are not good business partners. They don’t understand money.

2) Let that first wave go by then look at your situation from your employers eyes Is there a reason switching days is not doable for her? Knowledge is power. Ask what the issue is with an eye toward resolving the matter to both of your advantage.

3) Nothing to lose by having a calm rational conversation in which you remind her of what you’ve done and how loyal an employee you’ve been.

4. Remember when people hurt your feelings 9 times out of 10 it has more to do with what they’re dealing with than you.

5. Even if her problem is you find out what and why. That will do one of two things: a) tell you she does not appreciate you – which means it’s her bad or b) tells you where you can improve next time. (eg what was your approach? – did you TELL her what days you could work or ASK if you could switch? People get their noses out of joint for the smallest of reasons.)

6. Remember no matter how an employment situation turns out – no one and I mean no one – defines who you are other than you.

And just keep this in mind – twice in my life jobs went poof on me. One (at a law firm I could see the writing on the wall. They didn’t see me as partner material – I wasn’t going to bring in clients) – So in looking for a fall back position I ran for judge.

Power of Attorney was my first TV show. Got cancelled after 4 months. I swear I laid on the kitchen floor when they told me. It was my birthday. Took a while but I got DC.

Here’s my take on that. God moves me when I don’t have enough sense to move myself. All my best decisions were a function of getting out ahead of a problem I saw coming or in an aggressive – BUT POSITIVE – response to an unfortunate situation . If not for these unfortunate situations I’d still be working in a firm and hating every minute of it.

Don’t get me wrong I am not some zen monk who glides through trouble like a soaring eagle. I am just as vulnerable as the next guy. And if you read my book you know stability is never a given with me.

All I’m saying is let cooler heads prevail. You have the right to feel the way you do but you also have the power to respond with rationality and reason.

Good luck. We are all pulling for you.

What My Day is Looking Like

So here’s how I’m rolling today. I have a sticky contract situation that I am going to have to deal with.
NO PROBLEM.

I have to work on show treatments.
NO PROBLEM.

I have to take care of a legal matter.
NO PROBLEM.

I have to take the boys ‘back to school’ clothes shopping to day.
LORD DELIVER ME!!!!!!!

Back in the day I could go to Target buy them ten shirts and two pairs of jeans of my choosing. They didn’t care and when they wore out it was okay cause they’d outgrow them in 9 months anyway.

But now, they care. Which wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t mind shopping. They hate it worse than I do. So here’s what typically occurs. They pester me two days in advance (this has already occurred) about what it is they want and don’t want.

Then we go to the store (That’s today’s pain in the behind task) and since I have been informed – ad nauseam – about their preferences they expect me to wave a magic wand in front of the store and have all of their completed outfits pop off the racks and fly into my hands. They don’t want to look. They don’t want to try anything on. They express disgust at my suggestions.

So TODAY I am going to send them in. I’m going elsewhere. They’ll have an hour to pick stuff out. I’ll come back. Buy the stuff I approve of (They have a price limit) and am putting the rest back. I’m in no mood to molly coddle people today.

You know, I received a really interesting question from someone re: toxic relatives on MySpace. I think I will give it some though and have a general response to the issue.

By the way what’s up with MySpace? I haven’t been able to post for 2 days.

Still working on posting my woman cave pictures. You’re girl has had an techno-stroke. Brain can’t process buttons all of a sudden.

Anyway, you guys take it easy. I love the virtual family you have formed.

Peace.

People Places and Things

People:

1. I talked to a couple of interesting people in LA. One of them was a friend who worked in Michael Jackson’s house and was there the day he died. Can’t share what she told me. Always thought this person was a good person now I think she’s wonderful. She’s gotten mad money offers from The Enquirer and you name it, to tell her story. She needs the money but won’t take it. Every once in a while you have your faith in people restored from the strangest places.

2. And then there is you guys. I moan a great deal on this thing about life’s little dramas then on occasion one of you will give me a note of encouragement and make a brief reference to your won personal drama. I want you guys to know I appreciate the fact that you get I can’t take on everybody’s problems but that I am with you in spirit. Some of you are struggling hard and keep stepping. I love that!!!!!! One day when I get my fan club together I am going to have a forum of some sort called Stitch and Bitch. A friend of mine used to do it. It was a knitting club. Everybody came and knitted something but the real purpose was to get together and complain. I am going to figure out a way to have a virtual Stitch and Bitch. Some good humored moaning and groaning never hurt anybody.

3. One of you asked about that person I couldn’t find anything to like about and how I was doing with that person. You know, I have been so busy that she has been relegated to an asterisk in my life. That’s the real solution – not chocolate cake – I’ve been extra busy. I am working on lots of new projects – I might need your help with one by the way – more later when I have it together – but she’s now just a hang nail. You have to let people bother you and I just have too much important stuff going on. I am soooo over it.

4. Small storm blew through my recently calm marital waters. Actually that’s not true, it was a category 5 hurricane. But it was fast. Weird. Still weird. But calm again. Life is weird.

Places:

I finished my office. My woman cave is up and running. Having a little problem on the picture front though. Can’t find my before shots but I am going to try to send you some afters later today.

After I go to the grocery store today (and yes, I am at it again) I am going to clean the fridge and the bathroom. That’s my domestic goal for the day. I’ll have you know that the Maids have not been here in months and your girl is holding it together. Tell you what, Big E did his part while I was gone. Like I said the place sparkled when I got home.

Things:

Man oh man, I was going to upload a picture or video but it seems I’ve lost my touch. What are you gonna do?

HOME AGAIN

I am such a big baby. I don’t sleep well when I’m not at home. That’s one of the reasons I always so glad to get home.

Taping went well. House was sparkling clean when I got home AND there was hot take-out Chinese food in the kitchen.

Good trip though. 17 loves LA. he’s such a little man. When he gets to the studio he hangs out with everybody from the director to the make up people. I never see him till the end of the day.

Then we met Judge Judy. (that was the famous person I told you about.) She was so nice and kind and gracious. She took a picture with us but I have to get it from someone. WIll share of it comes through.

Still getting my head together. It’s funny 4 doesn’t miss me like he used to. Years ago when I would return from out of town he would come up to me and tell me he doesn’t feel well. Just so he could have me to himself for a while. It was so cute. But this time? He barely looked up from the computer. And when he did talk to me he said. “Can Nick and I . . . ”

Teenagers.

Anyway, glad to be at home. I am quite sure I have to go to the grocery store but hey, things are what they are. You guys take care.

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My Mother's Rules" is a humorous, easy to follow self-help guide to managing your emotional life.

Using lessons learned on the bench along with humorous anecdotes from her own 30 year marriage, Judge Lynn Toler wrote "Making Marriage Work" as a logical and simple guide to bringing back the practicality lost in relationships over the years.

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49/101/8/1

Posted by on Jul 29, 2009 in Uncategorized | No Comments

49 – My age 101 -The temperature at 8 pm -last night where I played tennis for 1 hour There is a thin line between dedication and foolhardiness and I flirting with it. Been getting a few interesting questions of late which I do plan to answer. Was going to do it this morning but […]

Cooler Heads

Posted by on Jul 28, 2009 in Uncategorized | No Comments

First, I want to say that the mall thing went as well as could be expected. I put them in the right department and then I went to look at purses. Little static when I got back. “I want this” “They don’t have that” My response was soul calming. “Find it here or find it […]

What My Day is Looking Like

Posted by on Jul 27, 2009 in Uncategorized | No Comments

So here’s how I’m rolling today. I have a sticky contract situation that I am going to have to deal with. NO PROBLEM. I have to work on show treatments. NO PROBLEM. I have to take care of a legal matter. NO PROBLEM. I have to take the boys ‘back to school’ clothes shopping to […]

People Places and Things

Posted by on Jul 26, 2009 in Uncategorized | No Comments

People: 1. I talked to a couple of interesting people in LA. One of them was a friend who worked in Michael Jackson’s house and was there the day he died. Can’t share what she told me. Always thought this person was a good person now I think she’s wonderful. She’s gotten mad money offers […]

HOME AGAIN

Posted by on Jul 25, 2009 in Uncategorized | No Comments

I am such a big baby. I don’t sleep well when I’m not at home. That’s one of the reasons I always so glad to get home. Taping went well. House was sparkling clean when I got home AND there was hot take-out Chinese food in the kitchen. Good trip though. 17 loves LA. he’s […]