IT WAS SO NICE
WE’RE DOING IT TWICE!
WEDLOCK OR DEADLOCK
Beginning August 31, 2009 we will be airing Wedlock or Deadlock again! Changing up a few things along the way!
Watch in the following cities at the following times:
New York: WNYW / 12:30pm
Dallas: KDFW / 11am
Phoenix: KSAZ / 1pm
Tampa: WTVT / 2:30pm until 9/7, then will switch to 1pm
Memphis: WHBQ / 12:30pm
It’s brand new to Dallas so if you’re there or know somebody who is tell them!!!!
Loving the judge references! You people are funny. I love it when people make me laugh!
Re: Michael Jackson, that’s hard to say. In most states a murder charge requires some intent to kill. In other words that had to be your purpose.
If this doctor, however, was living off the fat of the land giving Michael whatever he wanted to stay on the pay roll (which is my guess) I’m thinking the best they would get at trial is Manslaughter which in most states could be anything from willful and wanton to a reckless disregard for the others. In other words he did what he did without the least bit concern for Michael saftey and as a direct result of those actions Michael died.
On the other hand just because you have a license to prescribe medicine doesn’t mean you’re not a drug dealer. I know a couple of doctors who have been convicted for just that even when nobody died. They have rules. There must be a legit. medical reason for what they give people. “I want it” is not one of them.
But who knows. None of us have all the facts so there could be stuff going on I am not aware of. In any case sometimes when stars and emotions get involved even the legal system can get warped under the pressure.
After all prosecutors, who decide who to charge people and have a great deal of discretion in deciding what they will charge people with, (those are the people who wield more power than folks recognize and the ones least likely to be held accountable) juries and judges are all human. And as I always say people feel faster than they think and then the facts get sifted through that emotional strainer.
So we’ll see. The thing is not to pre judge and convict or exonerate through the media. That’s when emotion really has a chance to carry folks away. The fact that Michael was well loved and a genius should have no bearing on the charge. It should be the action, intent, causation and outcome. And while we are all certain of the last one the first 3 are still widely unknown to us regular folk.
On a personal note, I have decided that what my woman cave lacks is art. SO I am going to get three canvasses – practice on two and make something with the third. I have no artistic talent. But I don’t care. All I want is color and feel. It will be abstract simple light and happy. If it’s not hideous I might even share it with you guys. (odds of that are low but I like challenges).
My new shoes hurt. Put my banged up car in the shop. And I am in a really odd mood. I think I will limit the number of emails I send today. Don’t want to get into any ill-timed, or unnecessarily disruptive truth telling. I feel a little raw this morning. Don’t want to start anything I can’t finish.
Peace.
Look people, I was going to ignore this but have gotten a couple of messages this morning from several of you about this Q&A thing. Some in jest and others in concern. I don’t want either one. I want this thing put to bed.
My decision not to do it had nothing to do with me taking sides. I understand everybody is coming from a good place but MY decision had nothing to do with what you guys went back and forth about. I know I share personal stuff. But it’s my stuff to share. If I don’t want to do more that’s my choice even if it is less intrusive than what I already do. I have my reasons and I don’t think I should have to explain. And trust me I make my own decisions. I want to feel accessible but I do not want to feel consumed.
My husband says I have invited this with my candor. He may be right. I want to come here and enjoy. At the moment I am not. And that, as I said, is that. Can we move on now?
Remember people are starving to death somewhere.
Let us, as Jan, said ‘unite!!!!!!”
That’s my big news for this morning. Picking up 17. Turned into someone’s drive way and bam! Lady behind me said her breaks gave out. She ended up in the driveway with me, our cars wedged together so she could get out of the driver’s side. She was screaming. She apologized a lot but I said It’s okay these things happen. Why be angry?
I was pretty calm – confused at first but calm. Whole neighborhood came out (crash was loud.) Big E came. Nobody hurt. Called insurance company. That’s what they’re for.
Other than that weekend was peaceful. Today’s plan is to get the car to the shop. Wheel was impacted so E is going to try to get the metal off it before HE takes it to the shop.
Do have some good news though. Wedlock or Deadlock did well enough that it is getting a second run. Still in limited cities but we are adding a new one Dallas. Times have changed. Chuck will post particulars later.
I’ve decided against the Q&A thing. I understand it was harmless benign stuff like what’s your favorite color and I can choose to answer or not. But it’s just not my cup of tea. And that, as they say, is that.
You guys have a good day.
Peace.
Okay people, I see that the Q & A idea has gained some traction. How would this work? I can’t imagine what you guys would ask. As big E so often tells me I have already put all of my business in the street. Give me an idea of what you are talking about and I will see what I can do.
Trying to get the newsletter together for fan club members. Had one done in anticipation of this but the info in it is now old. So it might take a few days.
Every once in a while I get emails about race. Usually don’t like to touch that one – hot issue. But since a Crew member brought this up I thought I’d give it a shot. She asked whether things like Essence and Ebony festivals were reverse discrimination and asked whether I thought it was okay to exclude white people who really do want to address the race problem. She said that she felt a sense of exclusion and thought it did not help, but hurt, the racial harmony we so desperately want.
HERE’S MY FIRST STATEMENT. I DON’T GET UPSET BY DIFFERENT POINTS OF VIEW. LOVE RATIONAL CONVERSATIONS AND DIFFERENCES OF OPINION. I LEARN NEW STUFF ALL THE TIME. BUT EVERYTHING I DO HERE IS MEANT TO BE TOWARDS GREATER UNDERSTANDING. SO SAY WHAT YOU THINK BUT DON’T GET ALL EXCITED OR MAD. IT’S NOT THAT KIND OF PARTY.
So here’s my response to the black organization race issue thing in general. First, being black is not just a race issue. When we gather we talk about more than our relationship to white people. Being black involves cultural differences.
In the circles I typically travel in often I am the only one or one of a few. Then there are times where I am among mostly black folks at social function of family functions. These different groups have different social rules. I obey the rules of the room I am in.
I believe that black folks and white folks GENERALLY (there are always exceptions) have a different way of doing business and a difference of perspective. I don’t think that can be avoided. But – and here”s the important part – that is not a bad thing I like to think of this country as a salad as opposed to a blended drink. We live together in harmony but we retain our distinct identities. I think different cultures should be celebrated.
So the question is is it reverse discrimination when things like Ebony and Essence have conferences?
Here’s my take on that. First white people go to these conferences all of the time and they are not excluded. In the 2009 Essence Music Festival 3 of the 12 Headline acts were white. Second when black folks get together we are not just talking about discrimination. Our gatherings are not all racial problem solving. We have a vibrant culture. Just like the Irish or Italians may have cultural organizations black folks do as well. Jazz / Krumpin / hip hop / blues and rock and roll all have strong black roots.
Also black people are different – not better – not worse – but different. We can’t go to white hair shows and expect to pick up any tips, we have different medical issues. Sickle cell is the easy one but we have vastly different rates of all kinds of diseases. Valley Fever comes to mind. Black men have an especially difficult time with that disease – almost every black guy I know out here has had a bad case of it – something they’ve discussed among themselves to look out for. Black churches have a whole different vibe.
And then there are things like Step Shows. (Which i love and think they are the sexiest thing in the world!!! – all that hard core maleness OOOOOOOO 0)
(Okay, I’ve fanned myself now.) We did a show on divorce court this past season (hasn’t aired yet) where the guy was a frat bro. (a Q, I think) all of the black folks in production and I started laughing and talking about how we loved step shows. None of the white folks where hip to it so we explained.
We have (and frankly need to embrace more fervently) different ideas of beauty. Black men love ladies with ‘back’. I got back – a lot of sisters do – that’s why we often have so much trouble buying pants. Our waist to butt proportions are usually quite different than main stream designers create. There is also less pressure to be thin in the black community.
When you have a party with mostly black people it will have a different flavor than a party with mostly white people. We have different patterns of speech and different sensibilities as to what is funny.
But by the same token I knew several white people who “hung black” in college. It was cool cause they liked how we conducted business. And they were always welcomed.
Nothing wrong with being different as long as you don’t attach a value judgment – good or bad to it. So I guess the short answer is (of course as you know I rarely go for the short answer) no I don’t think black organizations are reverse discrimination. We have a real and separate culture that should be celebrated. And, like I said, white folks come. Last Tom Joyner (famous black radio host) party I went to white folks were there on panels and attending but we talked about black culture and issues beyond discrimination. We did the Electric Slide and dropped it like it was hot. The P Funk.
So there it is. I think we should spend time looking at positive aspects of things – even differences. Of course there are, as Tony Brown said, A liberal sprinkling of fools in any culture, hence you may have negative experiences crossing that racial divide. I know I have. But while you must be aware and break down barriers when you can I don’t believe sameness is the goal.
Harmony. Open mindedness and understanding. Let’s try for that.
My ten cents worth.
You’ve asked. She’s answered. In Dear Sonali, Judge Lynn speaks to all the young women who call her Mom2 or the Auntie in their Head.
My Mother's Rules" is a humorous, easy to follow self-help guide to managing your emotional life.
Using lessons learned on the bench along with humorous anecdotes from her own 30 year marriage, Judge Lynn Toler wrote "Making Marriage Work" as a logical and simple guide to bringing back the practicality lost in relationships over the years.
Judge Lynn Toler became the host of the longest running television court program, "Divorce Court" in 2006. Prior to that, Judge Lynn Toler graduated from Harvard University and The University of Pennsylvania Law School. She began practicing law in Cleveland in 1984. In 1993, at the age of 33, she was elected judge of The Cleveland Heights Municipal Court. Judge Toler volunteered actively in her community creating innovative programs for young offenders such as Woman Talk, a program designed to intensively mentor young, at-risk girls.
Toler also headed the Cleveland Heights Coordinated Community Response to Violence against Women, a countywide initiative for the coordination of community resources to assist women who are victims of violence. She was also active as an advisory board member for Templum House, a battered women's shelter. As a result of her work in the area of domestic violence in 2002, she was awarded The Humanitarian of the Year Award from The Cleveland Domestic Violence Center.
Judge Toler's dedication to ending domestic violence continues. Currently, she is on the Board of GoPurple.org, a non-profit organization that addresses the issue of domestic violence through education. GoPurple.Org sends educators into classrooms teaching students about healthy relationships, signs of potentially abusive relationships, and ways to help both themselves and others who are in abusive situations.
Judge Toler has served as an adjunct professor at Ursuline College, where she created and taught courses on Civil Rights Law, and Women and the Law. She was also a frequent instructor for the Ohio Judicial College, where she helped create and taught continuing judicial education course for other judges.
Judge Toler is the author of three books including her most recent "Making Marriage Work: New Rules for an Old Institution." Her first, "My Mother's Rules: A Practical Guide to Becoming an Emotional Genius" published in 2006, is a humorous memoir in which Judge Lynn recounts a childhood lived in the shadow of mental illness and provides a practical guide to the emotional lessons learned from that experience. And her time on the bench. Her second book, "Put It In Writing," coauthored with Deborah Hutchison, was published in September, 2009. It gives readers concrete, conflict-free solutions to the difficult situations that arise between family and friends.
Judge Toler has written for a variety of magazines including Divorce Magazine published through out the United States and Canada. In 2009, Judge Toler was given The Voice of Freedom Award by the Philadelphia Chapter of the Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. joining former honorees Colin Powell and Vice President Al Gore, in ringing the Liberty Bell on Martin Luther King Day.
Currently, Judge Toler appears regularly as a guest expert on WeTV's Marriage Bootcamp. Born on October 25, 1959, she has been married to Eric Mumford since April, 1989. She has two sons and four stepsons.
IT WAS SO NICE WE’RE DOING IT TWICE! WEDLOCK OR DEADLOCK Beginning August 31, 2009 we will be airing Wedlock or Deadlock again! Changing up a few things along the way! Watch in the following cities at the following times: New York: WNYW / 12:30pm Dallas: KDFW / 11am Phoenix: KSAZ / 1pm Tampa: WTVT […]
Loving the judge references! You people are funny. I love it when people make me laugh! Re: Michael Jackson, that’s hard to say. In most states a murder charge requires some intent to kill. In other words that had to be your purpose. If this doctor, however, was living off the fat of the land […]
Look people, I was going to ignore this but have gotten a couple of messages this morning from several of you about this Q&A thing. Some in jest and others in concern. I don’t want either one. I want this thing put to bed. My decision not to do it had nothing to do with […]
That’s my big news for this morning. Picking up 17. Turned into someone’s drive way and bam! Lady behind me said her breaks gave out. She ended up in the driveway with me, our cars wedged together so she could get out of the driver’s side. She was screaming. She apologized a lot but I […]
Okay people, I see that the Q & A idea has gained some traction. How would this work? I can’t imagine what you guys would ask. As big E so often tells me I have already put all of my business in the street. Give me an idea of what you are talking about and […]